Dr. Boyce: Dallas Cowboys Star Roy Williams Gets Ring Back From Ex-Girlfriend – Hmmmm

by Dr. Boyce Watkins.

Dallas Cowboys star Roy Williams got the world’s attention when he sent a $75,000 engagement ring and videotaped proposal to former Miss Texas, Brooke Daniels.  Daniels had been Williams’ girlfriend for a year, but she turned down the player’s engagement request.   She did, however, decide to keep the ring.

A signed affidavit by Williams says that he asked for the ring back, but Daniels says that she lost it.  However, an insurance company investigated and found that she’d given the ring to her dad for “safe keeping.”   Williams then filed a lawsuit to reclaim the ring, and Daniels finally coughed it up.

One can only imagine the number of black women in the world who are having an “SMH moment” over this one. Not to say that we can’t love who we want, but you can’t pretend that you don’t know why every black media outlet (including Your Black World) placed a picture of Williams next to the woman who embarrassed him.  Yes, my friends, the scandal of it all (for some) is probably because Daniels is white.

Although love can come to us in a variety of packages (and it’s always a beautiful thing), I admittedly wonder why so many black male professional athletes seem to hold white women at a premium.  I remember a consultant for an NFL team telling me that he once had a meeting with all the wives of the black athletes on the team, and there wasn’t one black woman in the room.  Now, this was way back in the late 1980s, but things haven’t changed much since then.

When I was at The University of Kentucky, I could have sworn that the basketball players thought that black women were part of another species with which they couldn’t mate.   Working at the desk in the dorm for basketball players, I would literally count five white women for every black girl on the continuous carousel of females hoping  to win some kind of really nasty sexual lottery ticket.  It’s not that dating white women is some kind of crime; the problem is when  you hold white women on a pedestal that is not accessible to nearly any black woman on earth.  Skin color should have nothing to do with the threshold of female attractiveness.

In the case of men like Williams, I see an easy connection to his apparent affinity for things non-black.  Roy was raised in Texas, where lighter skin is considered a premium in female beauty.  So, if Williams weren’t attempting to marry a white woman, it would be no surprise to see a man of his stature with a light-skinned (or “light skinned-ed,” depending on where you’re from) black woman.  In fact, a southern woman could have the face of Miss Piggy and still be considered attractive if her skin is light and she has “good hair” (you know, that long, straight or curly hair….anything other than the “disgusting” nappy stuff that reminds us that we’re from Africa).

From a Financial Lovemaking standpoint, I can say that Williams’ decision to take such a significant and public financial risk appears to be a bit illogical.  One would expect that a man who puts so much on the line would make sure that he was going to get the answer he expects.  We’d also hope that he’d be sure not to marry a woman conniving enough to lie about losing the ring.  A beautiful woman is attractive on both the inside AND the outside, but it appears that this woman may have been a thief.  When I was engaged to an amazing and conscientious woman at one point in my life, I wasn’t surprised in the least when she returned the ring once we decided not to marry.  Note to Roy:  That’s what decent women do.

So, while some of us may have our concerns about men like Roy chasing after the  deceptive beauty queen with blonde hair, we can at least fault him for being a little stupid.  But then again, the words “Cupid” and “stupid” often end up in the same sentence, and all of us have fallen victim to the drug of love.   Let’s hope Roy chooses a little better next time and that he also remembers that beauty is more than skin (color) deep.

Dr. Boyce Watkins is as Professor at Syracuse University and founder of the Your Black World coalition.  To have Dr. Boyce commentary delivered to your email, please click here.

  • Beverly

    Since Roy Williams wanted his ring back, the ex-girlfriend did the right thing. Why make waves, now they both can move on.

    • Rachel

      Are you reading? She did not simply “give the ring back” he had to file a suit and commence an insurance investigator! DUH

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_3UWUSS7HPPFMEGZR2SFALZYHLY Marian

    Another “dumb trick” black man, thinking marrying white makes him somebody!!

    • Samdromeda

       Guess who is coming to dinner. Watch that movie.

      • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_3UWUSS7HPPFMEGZR2SFALZYHLY Marian

        I saw it when it first came out in the 60’s.

      • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_3UWUSS7HPPFMEGZR2SFALZYHLY Marian

        Keep in the mind that was tv, acting not life!!! Just a made up movie.

        • Samdromeda

          The beauty of any illusion is making it real. It was a Hollywood film with big bank. It presented an emerging reality with the prevailing attitudes from both sides of the continuum of social viability from upper middle class black and white families. The wedding proceeded based on Patriarchal approval. It is a film with honor. In reality there are many successful marriages like that where the bond is so strong that it appears that God is backing them up. In fact God stated that He hates divorce. 

  • Elrancho2

    This is yet another aspect of the residue of racism in America.  Obviously, many successful black men feel a white wife is some kind of previously unattainable bonus that comes with success when often it’s the opposite.  If any two people are genuinely in love, then I wish them all the best but in this case, the former Miss Texas was not a good choice. Roy Williams had a very lucky escape and I hope he aims higher next time.

    • Lisa

      Do not even blame this on racism–please all black people don’t have this issue. Put the blame where it belongs on these individuals and the folks who raised them for failing to teach them about self love.

      • bERDELL fLEMING

        WOW! WELL SAID, SELF  love  is most important if African AMERICAN MEN  COULD REALIZE THIIS AND STOP LUSTING after others I  BELIEVE  IT WOULD SO POSTIVELY affect our people

      • Elrancho2

        But isn’t racism the root cause of some people failing to love themselves?

        • Lisa

          Yes it is that’s why it’s your parents responsibility to counteract that. And truthfully, it’s most likely a case of these people possessing a low self-esteem.  What’s the famous quote, no one can make you feel bad about yourself without your permission.

          • Elrancho2

            Good quote – I’d never heard it before.

          • Samdromeda

               People may not remember what you said but they will remember how you made them feel. Words shape forces in the conscience of others. Tell that famous quote to the women who suffered in the Bosnian Rape Camps. Verbal degradation preceeds domestic violence. One who is objectified and verbally degraded is a target to be destroyed. It is the spirit of The Destroyer at work. “I am who I am and your approval is not necessary” is a quote with teeth and integrity. Racial profiling is a form of institutionalized objectification. It gave rise to The Bloods and the Crips and self policing communities. Tell that to the neighborhood in Philadelphia that was bombed by Chief Rizzo and the F.B.I. Permission for objectification is never given.

        • Samdromeda

              It is the imposition of oppression that makes people want to be someone else somewhere else. It produces a syndrome where the oppressed will actually envy and fall in love, so to speak, with the oppressor. Oppression brings the wrath of God down on a people. It is a dangerous game to play and it always comes back to bite you. Stockholm Syndrome is a byproduct of total control and oppression individually and culturally.

      • Samdromeda

         Self love seems to be code for “stick to your own kind.” That is a law of nature. It has been taught that it is sin do do otherwise. Thomas Jefferson and Strom Thurmon violated that rule. But the force and love of family is stronger than that.

        • Anonymous

          Thomas Jefferson was with an enslaved woman of African descent. There is no way that we can tell whether or not the relationship was consensual or whether she acquiesced because of her position as someone else’s property. The same holds true for Strom Thurmond who impregnated the 15 year old daughter of the family’s maid. Who is to say if this relationship was consensual or another instance of a woman (in this instance a girl) doing what she had to do to survive life in a racist America?

          I’m quite sure there are other more apt examples of white men with Black women, but those two instances are not good examples.

          • Samdromeda

            The following generations did not drop the legacy of who their progenitor were. Strom loved his daughter and vice versa. Thomas Jefferson’s descendents did not deny who their progenitor was. It was quite the revelation and they still carry the familial name. . Hence the force and love of family. To not know your origins is to be like a tree without roots. When the matrix was open a being came forth. These men did support their own on the other side of their sin.

  • Forevernprayer

    Sucker..He most likely gave her things worth more than that and that’s why she might have thought she could keep the ring. Black men have become paid suckers to be accepted by white America. Pay up..Becky found another Mandingo.Hahaha

    • Samdromeda

        Better Becky than Charles Taylor who slaughtered the Mandingo tribe with the financing of blood diamonds.

  • http://twitter.com/GREGORYABUTLER Gregory A. Butler

    Let’s be a little radical here. Why don’t we judge Roy Williams and Brooke Daniels as INDIVIDUALS, rather than seeing them as racial stereotypes?

    • Lisa

      Well in this case the stereotypes apply – remember stereotypes are based on some truth.  Maybe a better thing to do is to be honest so that maybe the next young pro athlete can learn before walking this path.

      • Samdromeda

          Yes my son give not all your strength to women. Stereotypes are based on playing the stereo over and over and over again until we actually believe that it is reality and therefore truth. What are the laws of dating , courtship and marriage? Thou shalt not attempt to marry a stereotype or be one. Especially if you are a professional athlete with big bank. The divorce rate on both sides of the fence is 50% or more. Do not be surprised if people hop the fence. A rule of thumb. If she is welcomed into your family and you are welcomed into hers you have just united two tribes.

  • Michael Pollard

    Well, I do see Dr. Watkins’ point of view, but in the realm of love what happen to Williams could happen to any of us.  The fact it happend in his pursuit of a woman who was white is merely incidental.  It could happen if he was dating an African American, Asian, Latina, or Caucasian.  As you pointed out in your experience the sister gave the ring back, maybe it wasn’t worth keeping in her eyes, but I digress and kid you.  You say that is what decent women does and I agree, but no one ethnic group has a monopoly on being decent.  His situation stems from his upbringing, and how he sees the world.  It is most unfortunate for him and hopefully he will learn from this experience.

    • Lisal

      Ok, Michael come on you and I both know exactly what happened here.  And even if the woman was Af-Am, he’d have to feel a little less foolish.  Come on be honest.

      • Samdromeda

          I have seen sisters school white girls in how to play brothers. There is no such thing as less foolish.

        • Anonymous

          Of course what you’ve seen is representative of all Black women’s interactions with white women. Anecdote does not an argument make.

    • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_WOFUB2UGHPH5N5TU3HYJKZVTZM Chilltown

      I doubt the good Dr knows about Roy’s preferences in skin color ie whether he favors light skin, dark skin, white/black or whatever. No one here knows the amount of sisters Roy has been with, or the number of blondes he has been with. This is a sad case of convicting this brother without due process.

      • Samdromeda

           Sociological Due Process. This sounds like a PhD program or a book that you are about to write. I look forward to reading your book. I encourage you to write it.

    • Samdromeda

         The imposition of will is a projection of power. He chose and he will choose again with experiential knowledge and a team of lawyers. Pre-nuptuals will come into play so the pot of gold will be divided per contract. We live in a material world and he became enthralled with a material girl. A sports groupie.

  • Autochthon

    I dated several marriage worthy white girls in my younger days. Lucky for me I was also experiencing the full force of racism/white supremacy that somehow they could not see. My logic told me that if I could get white girls of this quality I should also be able to get a black girl of this quality. It took me another 30 years; but I finally found one.

    • Lisa

      Gee maybe it took you so long to find a black girl of “this quality” because you were dating white girls first dummy.  Black women of “this quality” are not hard to find unless you looking in the wrong places.  I mean college campuses have way more young black women than young black men.  DUH

      • Autochthon

        I was the only black person in all of my classes from the 5th grade all the way through high school. I never learned how to speak jive. I approached many black girls and introduced myself and they laughed in my face.

        I found out years later that the finest black girl in my high school was asking about me. Not once in my life has a decent looking black woman ever approached me and introduced herself. There have been a lot of black women who told me years later that they were trying to get my attention by having sex with everybody else.

        • Lisa

          Ok, I’m going to start by apologizing for calling you a dummy-it was mean and me being flip. But your comment was so simplistic I couldn’t help myself.

          Now as for the no black kids in your class, I get that it’s really not a unique situation, I was the only black girl in my classes from grade school on as well. (Same is true for my kids now-even college age daughter studying engineering)  But guess what, when I got to college I found myself surrounded by other blacks who were just as “smart” and “articulate” as I was.  I also found a wonderful husband there. 

          Thus,  I still have to say- so one black girl laughed in your face so you never talked to another  one? Perhaps you should have kept trying as you say others later indicated they were interested in you.  And what’s with the crazy “I never learned to speak jive foolishness”?  You really make a lot of stereotypical generalizations that call in to question your sense of self.
          Moreover,  this notion that some girls told you they were having sex with all the other guys to get your attention would only further support my point that you were looking at the wrong people.  

          Sound to me like you were shy and perhaps nerdy and I’m guessing you didn’t have many dates with white girls back then either.  But because one black girl laughed in your face, you started dating white girls. So it never had anything to do with there were no “quality” black women out there.  It was a choice you made because one rejected you early on so you concluded that she represented what black girls were and you looked in the other direction. 

      • Samdromeda

           A man seeks a wife and finds a good thing and obtains favor from God. We have to be careful if we expect to obtain favor from God. Too many women want to rule the man versus accept their leadership in the government known as the family. Men are not drones in a bee hive who’s main purpose is to fertilize the queen and die. You can marry into curses if you are not careful. There are many educated female assassins who castrate men on campus. They mine the landscape and you must be discerning and watch your step and watch yourself.

        • Anonymous

          Oh’ goodness gracious, pithy patriarchal prattle requiring women to be obsequious handmaidens. *pffffffft*

          • Samdromeda

            64

          • Samdromeda

            Handmaidens are an institution of the matriarchy. It is a part of the functioning structure of a household. Daughters fulfill this role in the nuclear family. Obsequious is a definite benefit to the loving unity of a family. It is well tempered  and never abused if the matriarch is worthy.

    • SapphiresMomma

      LOL!

      I like your post.

      Good for you!

  • Phillyindubai

    Good Grief..Brooke Daniels is just a money hungry bimbo who can’t spell “cat”. She was dropped by one goodlooking nice guy, and she threatened to commit suicide. Roy gave her money, and she asked for more and more. I say good riddance to that gal, Roy!

  • Big Papa

    I consider Roy a member of “The Dan Club.” Dumb Ass Nigga!

    • Jazzylady0901

      Big Papa no one could have said it better…sad to say it will continue amongst the pro black players.

    • Samdromeda

      I tell you, it ain’t no joke. The keyboard’s just like dope.

    • Thevoicetochoose

      Love it, The Dan Club, I will be using this one. lwol!

  • Mary

    Well now I guess he realizes he was just a meal ticket!  I feel sorry for him, at least the others are willing to marry their meal ticket and have a couple of babies to ensure they continue the checks coming but gee she didn’t even wanna do that.  I bet and he should feel stupid, how could he miss that.  I mean he’d been giving her money all along.  What an idiot.

    • Anonymous

      @a8ea4c97266885a8950c26a8476fe833:disqus 

      It seems that if he were just a meal ticket, she would have accepted the proposal no?  Why wouldn’t she want to keep eating with her meal ticket?

      • Samdromeda

         Maybe Papa was pimping out his daughter. Or maybe she thought she had game. Williams turned into the god of thunder with a team of lawyers.

    • Samdromeda

        Tell me Mary. What are the laws of dating, courtship and marriage? I remember Pope John Paul saying, “Do not  worry I have given Europe to Mary.” What power and sway do you have over men that turns them into idiots and brings nations under your control?  When men lust they can be strung along and manipulated. Keep them reaching and they will always come back and give. Mabey his love may give her thrills but his love wont pay the bills she needs money, that’s what she wants.  She needs money or a generous sugar daddy.

    • Thevoicetochoose

      Feel sorry for him, why?

    • SapphiresMomma

      Mary,

      I know your post was not directed to me, however I would like to ask you how do you know he was a “meal ticket”?  How would you know if he has been giving her money all along? Do you know these people personally?

      Are you assuming that because he is black and she is a white woman that he was a meal ticket and nothing else to her?

      Would you feel the same sorrow for him IF the woman involved was a black?

  • TruthAndJstice

    What!? “I admittedly wonder why so many black male professional athletes seem to hold white women at a premium.”  Have you heard of Dr. Frances Cress Welsing, author of the Isis papers.  This is old news, and I won’t say any more.  Oh yeah, and if you want to understand the black females role in this, just look at how grandmothers treat the children of there white daughter in laws vs. the children of their black daughter in laws.  Black people are not really trying to answer this premium question.  What a waste of ink!

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Olin-Ross/546574576 Olin Ross

    It’s all about forbidden fruit….We Blacks back in my days were not allowed to  even look at a White female or say one word to her….Remember Emmett Till….Deprivation can cause you to overkill when the opportunity become available….So now that we have that opportunity to mingle with that forbidden fruit we  overkill on that opportunity that used to be forbidden…..This is normal human behavior…..Remember Adam & Eve and the apple….Temptation……The devil is still alive and active…….

    • Samdromeda

      Men are men and women are women. There are white women who prefer black men and vice versa. I have had conversations with many white women whom I could swear were sisters with white skin and blue eyes. Deadly dispositions.
      They had to be that way due to life experience and environment. I have also found that there is a large proportion of these women, in the microcosm that I lived in, to be Native American. Racial polarization does not seem to exist in the tribes. Especially the Cherokee. 

  • Anonymous

    WOW!!! I am Cowboys fan with strong w thoughts aout this individual. $76k for a ring? Think about it people, 90% of these athletes are slaves! EVERYONE WANTS TO BE SO DAMN DIFFERENT BE YET DO THE SAME DAMN THING. I DO NOT KNOW THESE ATHLETES GET PROSTITUTED LIKE THIS. (WILL LYNCH IS DEAD PEOPLE, DEAD)

  • Anonymous

    WOW!!! I am Cowboys fan with strong w thoughts aout this individual. $76k for a ring? Think about it people, 90% of these athletes are slaves! EVERYONE WANTS TO BE SO DAMN DIFFERENT BE YET DO THE SAME DAMN THING. I DO NOT KNOW THESE ATHLETES GET PROSTITUTED LIKE THIS. (WILL LYNCH IS DEAD PEOPLE, DEAD)

    • Thevoicetochoose

      Willie Lynch’s body may be dead but his philosophy reigns alive and well!

  • SapphiresMomma

    Dr. Watkins,

    Human beings can like/love/marry, and be with whom ever they want! This is 2011!

    This man had a relationship with the woman for over a year!

    He asked her to marry him and she said no!

    This happens all the time, although not publicized!

    You would not have written this article if the woman involved was black!

    Stop the racist undertone!

    • http://www.facebook.com/chevas.samuels Chevas Samuels

      There is no racist undertone here. It’s subjective and what YOU choose to get out of it is the ‘underton’e you speak of. This article may not have been written had it been a black woman, but at the same time, I do not believe that Williams would have done those same things for a black woman, ESPECIALLY giving her a $75,000 ring! I read your posts quite a bit and I have to say, that I cannot see you being a black person. Not that all black have the same type of thinking, but your frame of reference to stories makes me wonder why you defend the white side ALL THE TIME?  These issues are not brand new, but you respond as if you are brand new. If you are indeed black, then you epitomize the self hate you preach about. You take the time to criticize black people entirely too much for me to respect you. This is playing the devil’s advocate at it’s worst.

      • Samdromeda

        An adroit dance but it is intelligentsia dope. I do not believe equals assume which makes an ASS out of U and ME. Calling her out will not establish whether or not he would give a $75,000 ring to a black woman that he dated, courted and choose to marry. Objective and analytical beats subjective any day. Ask Williams. It beats being intelligentsia gestapo which is a paranoid stance. If holding back criticism earns your respect we are in trouble. As our Native American Brothers say…”I am who I am and your approval is not necessary.” 

      • Okpara

        People have forgotten the experience with dolls by Dr.Kenneth Clark with the white and black dolls. Black children selected the white dolls over the black because of the indoctrination to hate themselves through the family, media,and environment. I’m Black and I proud should be a montra for our people, especially for our children or the mental destruction will continue.

        • Samdromeda

          What do you say to the Nigerians who tell blacks in America…”You have no flag. You have no country. You have nothing.?” Indoctrination is an implied message from a generation who tried to assimilate with conked hair and alligator shoes. The oppressor desired to have it all when separate but equal brought prosperity to black communities across the nation. With red lining [ which engendered neighborhoods with names like chocolate Bottom and Crow’s Nest] and the implemented expendability of black workers [last one hired and first one fired] much frustration and rage was fostered by gestapo police state tactics.Vietnam happened and many were trained by the military.White man’s war. Black man’s fight. Bush Senior signed into law the fair Housing act with the statement..”These men served our country and ‘ll be damned if I will deny them their house.” Dr. Kenneth Clark’s results had no controls  and the exposure to a white dominated media actually infused into the mindset of many children that being white was normal. People want to be free but they still watch T.V.   I remember a white reporter asking An war Sadat why his skin was so dark. He replied my,”Mother was a black woman ”
          stated with a matter of fact disposition. Truth, character building,  wisdom, knowledge, understanding, achieving goals with the adroitness of an episodic discontrolled teenager build the person. We have this power in earthen vessels.We are not to compare ourselves with one another or with the objectified image of an oppressor whom God says not to envy or choose any of his ways.

        • SapphiresMomma

          Not to worry!

          Black folks have not forgorrten about the black/white doll experience.

          Black doll experiment, Willie Lynch, and self- hate! Nooooo, black folks will continue to pass these messages along faster than the drums LOL!

          The results of that particular “experiment” is the fault of the children’s parent (s). It starts in the home. Not one of my children would have picked or said that the white doll was superior to the black dolls, and that is because we taught them about who they are, and that no human being was more superior/beautiful than they were.

          Far too many black children have heard that they were niggers, ugly, black, and so  many other negatives about themselves right from the family unit, and we all  know this!

          Are we really surprised that the black children picked the white dolls as being the best?  

      • SapphiresMomma

        Why do you think that?

        Is it because you think that a black woman would not deserve a $75,000 diamond ring?

        When have I defended the white side? What is your reasoning?

        And, just so you know dear, we do not ALL think alike. We all have different back grounds, educations, experiences, financial and economical considerations, and much more, so your words sound foolish.

        Lastly, I don’t give a rats ass about your respect (this is Cyberspace dear) because you don’t respect yourself,  and have no respect for others on the planet. 

        You issues about how you feel about yourself comes forward loud and clear.

  • Barbara2

    I know the poor child did not get the message:  The little white girl cannot be a part of the “T-Party” married to a wet-rag.  The ring was not an issue, but the words from “big-papa”, made all the difference.  I don’t care who marries who.  I have a problem with black athlete’s using my young black girls’ body on their way to the top, and drop them like a hot-cake when the check arrives.  No one white person can enslave anyone; its what we do to ourselves.  I hope next time he consider going to the trailer-park and do his shopping for a good wife.  My black girl’s will never be good enough.  I am glad she used his silly butt.

    • SapphiresMomma

      First off your black girl’s should not be allowing any man, athlete or not,  to be using  their bodies, period!  I am sure you must have taught them better than that, right?

      Why does the woman have to come from a trailer park?

      “My black girl’s will never be good enough.”

      You are right, we enslave ourselves!

      • Rachel

        your stupid

        • Samdromeda

            You are a daughter of Prometheus. How many Harpies eat your liver?

        • SapphiresMomma

          @ Rachel,@95df9c2e9a689fc084e676b54e040b2c:disqus 

          And you need to learn how to properly  use “your” and You’re.

          Hood-rat!

    • Samdromeda

        Are you saying that he should have gone “Country?”

  • Altha Cutright

    He look so STUPIDS! 

    • Samdromeda

          He wasn’t posing for G.Q. She craps on his heart and “HE” looks stupid? He did get the ring back.

  • mikeajeff

    I’m amazed that the same can be said about Black women in relations to white men, but no one has pointed this out!

    No one ever challenges the fact that there are huge number of Black women, especially in Hollywood, who are dating, engaged, or married to white men.
    The list includes, but not limited to:
    Sanaa Lathan
    Kerry Washington
    Tatiayna Ali
    Serna Williams
    Venus Williams
    Stacey Dash
    Garcelle Beuv. (Fancy from the Jaime Foxx show)
    Tamara Lowrey (Sista/Sista)…..and few others whose names I forgot.

    For Black women to sit on this site and say, “Amen Dr. Watkins,” is totally out of bounds!

    I could care less who these young sisters date, marry and/or sleep with. It’s their business. Both stop calling the kettle Black!

    • umbasi2

      Yeah don’t forget Eve, Halle Berry (though half white), Susan Rice, Corrine Bailey Rae, Heather Headley, Tyra Banks, Kim Wayans, Kelly Rowland, Michelle Williams (Destiny’s Child), Golden Brooks, Tracey Edmunds (Babyface ex), Naomi Campbell, Iman, Tina Turner, Dianne Carrol, Diana Ross, Whoopi Goldberg, Janet Jackson,
      Zoe Saldana (though I think she may be Latina), Paula Patton, Alfre Woodard and
      Maya Angelou. All of these women are or have been with white men at some point. But I’m like you Mikeajeff, I really don’t care who they date or if they date men of any color. Sometimes I just think our people like to take shots at the other sex just because.

      • Nikkimichellchis

        Did any one on here remember that Roy Williams was once dated or was engaged to Kelly Rowland from destinys child… So I really don’t think this story should convict him he just got caught up in some trash as we all have one time or another

    • http://www.facebook.com/chevas.samuels Chevas Samuels

      You are right about 85% of your list, but HERE is the difference: NONE of these black women have gone on record (or anywhere else) spitting venom on black men AND each of them have dated or married a black man in the past! Many of the black male athletes in question MIGHT have dated a sister a million years before they became rich and famous, but once the checks rolled in, they suddenly saw black women as unworthy of sharing in their success. Some even called black women ‘gold diggers,’ to justify their sudden choice of ‘white meat only.’ Would these same athletes have these ‘quality white women’ if they had no money?

      • Samdromeda

        Damned if you do and damned if you don’t. Money or not a black man would be accused of being with white trash even if he were with a white woman of quality. 

    • Thevoicetochoose

      Serena dates a black man. Common is not white

      • SapphiresMomma

        Serena dates white far more than she dates black, and fact is she is seen out and about alone more than she is seen with anyone, white or black!

        She may be hanging with Common now (last time I saw them was after the holidays), but she has been seen on the beaches with white!

        Nothing wrong with dating whom-ever rings your bell!

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Vernon-Sukumu/100000963359102 Vernon Sukumu

     Many if not  Most of the famous black people we know, marry folk that are lighter then them. Many of then know if its not for their fame are money, some of the people they marry would not speak to them.  First there is no such thing as just happen to fall in love for the famous and wealthy people. They have access to a much larger pool to choose from.  When was the last time one of those famous persons happen to fall in love an marry a four hundred pound anybody? Never. Angelia Bassett, Magic Johnson, Danzelle Washington are a very few of the famous people we know that are married to people that look as if they came from the same tribe. Should people have the right to marry who they wish, the answer is yes. The rest of us have the right and the responsibility to discusse all issue’s that have any apperances of the distructive behaiver that have followed us sence our days of slavery. 

     

  • kevintj

    The race of the woman doesn’t really matter… Plenty of black males have made the same mistake, or worse with black females.

    The real problem is that he is not smart, nor intelligent… He is obviously a p%#y beggar.

    All the education and money in the world can’t save a foolish mind.

    peace

    • Rachel

      The race does matter , and you know it…I know if your doing the same thing as “poor” Roy did, than one will rather say race dont matter when realy it should be more like” truth hurts”

      • Samdromeda

        Sounds more like shaming and shunning and shushing. And what tribe are you from that you have these attitudes? What language do you speak. Were they both United States Citizens? Have you read Loving versus The State of Virginia? There is a legal framework that tore down the wall of partition in the form of racial classification in matters of the heart which forbid the criminalization of interracial marriage. It used to bring a prison sentence. Am I sensing that there is a desire to remove that safeguard?
        If race does matter what is your blood quantum and genetic profile that identifies your native clan. Are you willing to learn your native language?
        I think that you would be thoroughly surprised if you knew the truth about race. It is much more than skin tone and hue. There has always been a great mixed multitude. They were not pure bloods they were merely turned. I sense a rise in the doctrine of racial purification in your posts. Only life matters and the ability to function in this world. The law of the hills is “If we can depend on each other for survival we are family.” But in the interest of racial purification, Abraham did marry his half sister. Many men in Africa had multiple wives and lived close to the land. Finding a mate was easier in those days and there was not the corruption of a consumer based society. There was only honor and building the family.

  • Anonymous

    come on Doc. Luv ya but you could have passed on this one. 

  • Awj5001

    When are these black men going to wake up when it comes to white girls. These negroes feel like they made itwhen they grt one, your lucky your dumb black ass wasn;t accused of rape. What’s next for you a mexican? i hope she gets all she can out of your self hating black ass.

    • Samdromeda

        Go read some Frantz Fanon. You sound like what he speaks against. There is no self hate. There is only the pro active acquisition of what one desires. If it is mutual and acceptable between the two parties your assessment and or opinion or feeling holds no validity. To spin a negative hope for someone is to desire it for yourself. 

    • Samdromeda

       You have to be comfortable in your own skin.

    • Samdromeda

      Mexicans call us Black Gringos or black white men. There is no stretch in that coupling.

    • SapphiresMomma

      Why does the man have to be “self hating” simply because he was dating/having a relationship with a white women?

      Some black folks have the words “self Hate” on speed dial with every conversation! LOL, LOL.

      Perhaps the man thinks higher of himself than you do!

      WHites and blacks have been getting together for generations, and they will continue to do so. Get over it!

  • Boydbrbr239

    I THINK IT IS A WONDERFUL THING TO MIX UP THE SOUP, MAYBE SOMEDAY WE WILL NO LONGER HAVE  RACIAL PROBLEM’S IN THIS WORLD. ESPECIALLY IN THIS COUNTRY. MAYBE MORE BLACK WOMEN SHOULD DATE MEN OF OTHER RACE.
    REMEMBER THIS IS A FREE COUNTRY.

    THANK YOU.
    CPT.B.B.

    • Cheeba

      i’m gonna have to disagree, respectively.

      our existence is in a realm of duality, meaning that there’s good vs. evil, light vs. dark, hot vs. cold, wet vs. dry, you get my meaning.

      in this case, the ‘us vs. them’ mentality will never go away. the races have been mixing for ages, but one cannot predict how a child will look upon birth, so the idea that everybody will be beige is a fallacy.

      but let’s play with it, shall we?

      in the near future, everybody is mixed and nobody is a ‘pure’ of any ethnicity. i predict that the lighter of the group will be put on a pedestal, while the dark mixed people are put at the bottom.

      no matter what, racism will continue and the idea of ‘kumbaya’ is only a fantasy and an excuse to those who don’t want to confront racism at its base.

      • Samdromeda

        Geneticists would disagree with you. Oppositional objectification is a by product of a war mentality and is perpetuated by mutual oppression. Albinos are the most oppressed people on the planet and they are oppressed by white [beige people] and black people. The whole Family concept blows the oppositional  mentality out of the water. There are large families on this continent of multiracial origins under one family name. To speak against the family name brings thunder from all quarters.This is what real unity is.  FAMILY

    • Thevoicetochoose

      There is no way in hell I’d date a white man. One attempted in High School and I could not even let him kiss me. Yuck! Now after being tormented and bullied by an white skinned male beast, hell to the No! Www dot couragelive dot com

  • Eervin44

    Home girl wanted to keep the ring since she’s been getting a lot of gifts from him anyway, If they been dating for a year she was not going any farther, he ask to marry her she turn him down she didn’t really want to be with him, her eyes was on the $$$$$ I’m glad he got his ring back hopeful he want do this jacked up plan again…The only reason her and father gave up the ring it got out in the news and really didn’t want to be ashame any longer…

  • Anonymous

    I think one thing Dr. Watkins ignored in his assessment of the situation is that when anyone becomes a millionaire, his/her financial and social peers change.  Whether that person becomes a millionaire by being a business executive or by being a professional athlete, Dr. Watkins is remiss is noting that the richer a person in America gets, the less black his environment gets.  A guy who at one time couldn’t afford a membership to the nicest country club in town or the fanciest restaurant town is less likely to see a black woman as a patron in those environments.  She may be part of the “help”, but rarely a patron.  My point is simply that people typically date people who travel in the same circle as themselves.  Roy Williams isn’t unique in this situation, nor are other black men who do this because black women do it too.  If a black woman is insisten on dating man on her same social/financial status, that man oftentimes is not black. 

    Dr. Watkins made several salient points in this article, but I don’t think it’s right that he ignored how high income changes your dating pool to reflect people who travel in the same circles as you.  

    • SapphiresMomma

      You are absolutely right!

      In addition, it bothers me that Dr. Watkins thought it was was a good idea to put this black man on blast!

      Black women have declined mens proposal of marriage, and many have kept the ring!

      Back in the day (not too long ago) it was a woman’s right to keep the engagement ring even if she did not marry the man.

      This man had an on going relationship with this woman. The real issue here is that she is white!

      This black man is being used by one of his own, and it was unneccessary and not a class act in my opinion.

      • Anonymous

        While I certainly believe that certain black men date white women as a means of raising their perceived status or their own self esteem (e.g. O.J. Simpson), Dr. Watkin’s addressed this situation in a rather simplistic manner, and so have other posters.  Some posters have called the young woman in question “trailer trash” in attempt to paint her as a socially unsophisticated fish out of water who was only after his money.  The reality is that she comes from a beauty pageant background, a world that requires a lot of money, training in social graces, and social connections to thrive in, so she probably comes from so either she, her family, or both have ample resources of their own. 

        It’s not so much that I want to come to the defense of the girl.  I think an engagement ring should be returned if the proposal is declined or if the engagement is called off.  However, as a black woman, I’m tired of the knee-jerk reaction my peers have towards a wealthy black man dating a white woman.  It’s as if simply having money qualifies the brother in question as being a good man.  A perfect example of this is Tiger Woods.  I can’t think of anyone who would exchange the public humiliation Elin did, just to live the lifestyle of a millionaire’s wife. 

        • Rachelj

          Are you being for real , or just here to make black women feel bad about themselves just like SappMoma seems to enjoy doing.  Go somewhere else you are a troll!  Trying to say black women are less because they can not live up to the image of rich black man like white women can. Seems to me like you have a real problem or  jealousy of black women. ( dont believe your black female ) if you are , my dear you and SappMomma have self hating issues . Go deal with those problems instead of posting in such a forum.

          • Samdromeda

            The Black Female Proletariat, who stand on their own two feet, and who skipped rope as children to the rime “Destroy black boy. I said it. I meant it. I’ll soon represent it,” do not  base their self image on lack of access due to mixed race couplings. Money rules and men can be bought as long as they let the woman rule which is unnatural and turns the culture upside down.

          • Samdromeda

            Who made you moderator? You are a sniper.

          • Anonymous

            That comment seemed like a bit of psychological projection because you appear to be a sniper, or maybe you just play one on the internet.

          • Samdromeda

            You are watching me. I am flattered.

          • Anonymous

            @1c2de51cd0bd0916d9aa850d3960f5e7:disqus 
            Your failure to believe that I’m a black woman doesn’t negate my existence as actually being one.  I think you are crippled by the mentality that black women are a giant monolith who all think and live alike.  That simply isn’t the case.  If you don’t like my posts, your option is to simply not read them.  You have no power to censor me on this or any other forum.  If that impotence frustrates you, I kindly suggest that you move on with your life. 

            Best regards,

          • SapphiresMomma

            You sound like a fool!

            What is being written/espressed that would make you or anyone else think I want to make black women feel bad?

            You are the one who apparently have “self hating” issues, and you should deal with them, my dear!

          • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_W4URVX2AFXHIKJ2ZF7PVKDRJOY Meangrl

            You spelled ‘expressed’ wrong. Can’t really take you seriously when you call someone ‘stupid’ or ‘fool’ then fire back with a misspelled word. Perhaps you should ‘deal’ with a dictionary.

          • SapphiresMomma

            LOL!

            And, I feel certain that YOU are a smart enough “Meangrl” to know that it was a typo, right?

            Don’t be so petty & dumb!

          • SapphiresMomma

            LOL!

            And, I feel certain that YOU are a smart enough “Meangrl” to know that it was a typo, right?

            Don’t be so petty & dumb!

        • Thevoicetochoose

          Plenty would for the amount of money she received. It’s just like Monica Lewinsky getting $4 million for orally stimulating President Clinton’s phallus. Many women stated they would have “sucked” that thang for $4 million, some said for $1 million, so many would have endured what Elin did for that payoff. We live in MoneyAmerica.

      • Rachel

        Again , I ask why are you here!??????????????

        • SapphiresMomma

          I am here for the same reason that you are here, to voice my opinion!  Why is that so hard for you to understand?

          In addition, stop with the typical Black response that one has to have self-hate if they do do agree with your assessment of an issue!

          We do not all think the same way, stupid!

          I stand by every word I wrote, and still wondering why Dr. Watkins chose  to further embarrass this Black Man simply to “rile up the negros” which certainly has had the typical, expected reaction from folks with your limited mentality.

          • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_W4URVX2AFXHIKJ2ZF7PVKDRJOY Meangrl

            So, in keeping with your “typical black responses” statement, isn’t it VERY typical to call someone ‘stupid’ when they question your intent? 

      • Samdromeda

          Acceptance of the ring is an implied acceptance of the proposal. To keep the ring and refuse the proposal is an act of war. It dishonors the father of the infringing female. Keeping the ring is a presumption that you do not want to make. It is a contract. If you refuse the contractual proposal you had best return the ring or else.

        • Yokai

          “To keep the ring and refuse the proposal is an act of war.”

          exactly.a gift/contract intended only for the betrothed.

    • Samdromeda

        Donna Summers, Ertha Kit, Dianna Ross and Lenny Cravits’s mom all married white men. Rich Black women are exotic to Jews.

      • Thevoicetochoose

        Exotic, what about just rich

  • Samdromeda

       Black female attitude is a precursor to the feminist movement. Looks has nothing to do with it.  Black men are exotic to white women. A veritable forbidden fruit that everyone wants to taste before escaping back into polite society. Pleasant memories that you never discuss with daddy.

  • http://www.facebook.com/people/Frances-Caldwell/1001986350 Frances Caldwell

    PEOPLE GOOGLE JOHN HENRY CLARK AND READ BRAINWASHED by T. Burrell both will explain all the madness!!!

  • Aw52399

    thats whats his stupid black ass gets that white girl dont love his asss in no way shape or form niggas always make a fool of themselves over a white slut.

  • Regg’e

    More so interesting is the fact that with 70 to 80% of black households are single parent and mainly women, you would think that there would be more of an affinity for especially athletes to draw automatically to women of color. Does this imply perhaps there’s more to do with innate self hate issues?

  • Greg F. Walton

    It’s essentially a self-esteem issue that is particular to Black-American men and women. T. Burrell calls it brainwashing. I refer to it as post-slavery traumatic disorder that has been exacerbated by our need to seek approval from those whom have held power over us. Long ago we learned to deny our existence in order to survive. We were forbade to speak our languages, eat our foods, raise our families, be educated or suffer the pain of torture and death or more importantly, believe in our God(s). We see and hear a litany of messages, overt and subliminal, from all peoples and media, that speak to our inferiority to a point that we start to believe that we are inferior. Now imagine that this delusion has been passed on generation after generation and over that period of time we look for different forms of self-gratification to make us feel worthy. And, through all of this there germinates a seed of self-loathing to the point that we don’t trust ourselves, let alone one another. 

    Now here’s another thought. What was the motivation of Miss Texas and why aren’t we rebuking her?

    Just a thought or two.

  • Thevoicetochoose

    Dr. Boyce, you are coming back now. You are right on time, right on target with this editorials, love, love it. We are more than SOHs, some of us are saying good for him, that is what he gets. She was probably using him anyway. She more than likely would not have given him the time of day if he wasn’t a Baller. Damn Dummy

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_3UWUSS7HPPFMEGZR2SFALZYHLY Marian

    Again another “dumb trick” blackman. Trick? because if he didnt  have money he wouldnt get the time of day.   Yet he is not the only one.  Sad, Sad, Sad!!!

    • SapphiresMomma

      If he didn’t have money he wouldn’t have gotten the time of day from many black women either!  Right?

      • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_3UWUSS7HPPFMEGZR2SFALZYHLY Marian

        WRONG!!! not all black women are looking for a “pot of gold” and to lie around and do nothing.  There is more to life than money, no we have not lost sight of the values that was instilled in us.  Proverbs 31:10 Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies

        • SapphiresMomma

          Did I write ALL black women?

          I wrote that he wouldn’t have gotten the time of day from many black women either!

          And that is the truth!

  • http://pulse.yahoo.com/_3UWUSS7HPPFMEGZR2SFALZYHLY Marian

    Langston Hughes wonder what he would say???